Adventures Part 28: Fin!

September 12, 2010 at 8:16 am (diets, Dilators, Exercise, health, Making the most of your time, relationships, resolutions, sexual dysfunction, Things to do before you're 30, Travel, Vaginismus)

I can’t believe this is going to be my last entry on this blog! Today is my last day in my 20s and technically I’m no longer a virgin, so this is it. As I write, Wonder Boy is running a half marathon, so I have some time to reflect and write this.

I’ve read quite a few articles about what I should have, have done, be able to do by the age of 30, but none of them jumped out at me. I had, had done, was able to do most of them by the age of 25. So, I’ve decided to make my own list!

1: Be independent of your parents – financially at least!

2: Have a close group of friends who you can trust with secrets, call at anytime of the day or night and who can see you first thing in the morning without being scared!

3: Have travelled outside of your home country – there is no excuse to not have left your homeland by this age, you have to be at least a little bit curious about the big bad world. And, if you think your country is the best in the world, you’re deluded…..no country is!

4: Have lived in another country.

5: Be able to communicate in another language or at least be  able (and willing) to communicate using signs, pictures and phrasebooks.

6: Try different types of food – if you decide you don’t like something after you’ve eaten it that’s fine, but don’t knock it til you try it! (Even if it is sheep’s brain and you know you won’t like it, you never know when you might have to eat it out of survival and it’s better to be prepared!)

7: Have had a really crap job – it builds character!

8: Have experienced love – I’m not saying you have to be married or in a relationship, or to ever have had one, but I think it’s important that you’ve fallen in love at some stage and it’s really great if someone loves you back!

9: Have been really drunk and done something silly (once is enough for this one, but most of us have more than one story to tell!) Apparently I have 10 fingers and I wanted everyone to know that!

10: Know where to go to get the perfect jeans, perfect black trousers, and shoes for you.

11: Have underwear that fits perfectly.

12: Be able to drive – I only learned when I was 25 and got my first car when I was 26, but it   was the best decision ever!

13: Have a fallback drink that you know every bar serves no matter where you are just in case someone offers to buy you one and you can’t see if the bar has your favourite beer/ wine/ juice. Every bar has soda and lime!

14: Know how to use a computer with confidence.

15: Don’t be afraid to talk to strangers.

16: Have a favourite possession that you can’t live without, but realise that people are more important than things!

17: Have a favourite movie/ song/ book or poem that can cheer you up if you’re feeling down/ get you ready for a night out/ calm you down or wake you up.

18: Be able to cook at least 7 different meals, so you don’t have to eat the same thing every day!

19: Be able to be a good hostess.

20: Have life goals – they don’t have to have deadlines, but a rough idea is good!

These are the things that I think are important to have, be able to do have done and have realised by the time you’re 30.

Now, as far as my list of resolutions goes, I suppose I’d better review them and see if I’ve had a productive year or not!

1: Save some money.

Tick! Money in a savings account, mortgage re-negotiated and a kitty for the holidays!

2: See new places

Tick! Barcelona and Morocco!

3: Find a new job

No. I’m doing new things at work, but it’s still the same place.

4: Get fit and healthy

Tick, but I need to keep it up obviously! There’s no point getting fit and healthy for one day!

5: Have sex!

TICK!!!!!! The biggest surprise of all! It’s not perfect yet by any means, but I can definitely say I am not a virgin!

6: Go back to Italy

No, but I WILL do it next year.

7: Make travel plans

We’ve discussed and thought about this a lot too. We think we might have a kinda plan, but we’re waiting for confirmation. So, this one is half ticked off!!!

8: Get a tattoo

No. I want to make sure the vaginismus is gone for good before I get it.

9: Wear a designer dress on my birthday

Tick! Thanks to my Mum I’ll be wearing a lovely DKNY dress for my party!

And I added a tenth of going camping at a music festival, which was also ticked off. So, 6.5 out of 10. Not too bad I guess!

And finally, I’d like to thank you all for reading. My blog has come to an end, but I’ll be keeping up with everyone else’s.    🙂     🙂     🙂     🙂

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Part 21: It’s the Final Countdown…..(na na na na, na na na na na, na na na na, na na na na na na na na…….!!!)

July 19, 2010 at 8:01 pm (baby steps, cholesterol, diets, Dilators, Exercise, health, jogging, Making the most of your time, relationships, resolutions, running, Summer, Things to do before you're 30, Vaginismus)

Only 8 weeks to go to my birthday! Yikes! I can’t believe it. The year has gone so fast. It only feels like a couple of weeks since I started this blog to keep a record of things.

So anyway, here are some updates:

Go to Italy: Last time I updated I thought I’d be going, but it looks as if I’m not going to be able to make it to my friend’s wedding in September. Some things have come up and I’m going to have a party on that day instead. Also, one of my other friends there is pregnant and due at the end of December, so I’ll probably take a trip next year anyway!

Get fit and healthy: I just had another informative chat with my doctor today (well, actually this time it was!) and I found out I’m a bit anaemic, which explains a lot. On the major plus side, I’ve managed to lower my cholesterol level by 1.2!!!!! He was really surprised! My running programme is also going well. I surprised myself today by being able to run for 6 minutes. Wonder Boy has pointed out that soon I’m going to have to get a bigger loop to run. The aim is to be able to run for 30 minutes by my birthday.

Have sex: I had my 1st pain-free experience with the 2nd dilator yesterday. I was so happy! I’m also still using the 3rd one as well, but I haven’t gone any further than half-way with it. I did psyche myself up to make an appointment with the gyn though and it’s in 5 weeks time.

And….I’ve decided to retrospectively add another resolution. I just knew 9 was too odd a number to have! So, Resolution Number 10: go camping at a music festival! I’ve never been camping and we bought out tent on Saturday, probably one of the wettest days of the year so far. The festival is in 2 weeks time and I just hope it stays dry.   🙂

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Part 18: I Need A Vuvuzela!!!

June 30, 2010 at 6:56 pm (cholesterol, diets, Dilators, doctor's visits, Exercise, health, relationships, sexual dysfunction, Vaginismus)

Anyone watching the World Cup in South Africa will be familiar with the vuvuzela. It’s a plastic blowing horn which makes a loud noise. It’s typically used at South African football matches and some say it’s ruining their enjoyment of the matches on TV. Personally, I don’t even notice them and, if anything, I think they add atmosphere. I’m alone in thinking this in my family. I’ve just discovered a shop in town selling them and I’m seriously considering buying one to vent my anger.

I had the most useless doctor’s visit ever on Monday. I went to him to talk about my cholesterol and weight gain. I wanted him to review my last test results to see if he could think of anything to link all my symptoms together. He didn’t really feel like talking about that, but wanted to give me lots of advice on vaginismus. Some might think that great, but the advice was as follows:

Have you ever thought about having a few drinks to relax because, you know, if you could just have intercourse once, you’d be fine.

You need to have that snipped.

You need to get that sorted because your boyfriend must be very frustrated.

Take a Valium an hour before going to bed and see what happens.

And my personal favourite piece of advice was:

Be careful not to get pregnant!

So, I left the doctor’s office with a prescription for diazepam and a form for a blood test.  🙂

I cried a lot out of frustration and anger on Monday night and that’s why I thought a vuvuzela would be a great idea. I think there would be something very satisfying about making a tiny noise sound huge! I had the blood test today and in the interest of experimentation I will try a Valium at the weekend………just to see what happens!!!   😀

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Adventures Part 14: Black Cats Crossing Your Path……That’s Good Luck, Right???

June 2, 2010 at 7:19 pm (Changing jobs, cholesterol, diets, Dilators, EFL, Exercise, health, Making the most of your time, relationships, resolutions, Summer, Teaching, TEFL, Things to do before you're 30, Vaginismus)

I see it’s been 3 months since I last gave updates on all my resolutions. There hasn’t really been a lot of progress on them, but seeing as it’s a little over 12 weeks to the big day, I need to kick myself into action on some points! So, this review is for my benefit!  😉

So here we go……..

1: Save some money.

Nothing major on this one – 100 here and there, but that’s it. We’ve a mortgage review in August though, so that should see the savings start!

 2: See new places

It’s been done. 🙂

3: Find a new job

Well….I have to do new things at work for the summer, so it’s kind of a new job within my job! I’ll be training high school teachers from all over Europe as well as training people to be TEFL teachers. I’ve done that bit before, but I’m going to be inspected on it by the Dept. of Ed. This time, which means a lot more work (a.k.a. stress!) Thankfully, it also means a little more money. That links in nicely to resolution number 1 too, so I have to be happy with that! I’ve also been looking into volunteering in September and I have a plan to get started on something more creative too involving writing and photography. Watch this space!

4: Get fit and healthy

According to the scales I’m down 7lbs. I don’t see it myself, but the scales don’t lie, right?!?!!? Wonder Boy’s marathon is in 5 days and that combined with the sunny weather has made me get more active in the evenings. I need a little extra though, so I’m going to check out some classes between now and September.

5: Have sex!

I’m still using the 2nd dilator, but I think I’m going to have to go back to the doctor for help with them. She only works on Mondays though, so getting an appointment before September might be difficult. I’ll have to think of a new title for the blog. How does Adventures of a 30 year old Virgin sound?!?!?!?!

6: Go back to Italy

Probably not going to happen, but it can happen next year!

7: Make travel plans

We’re going to have to wait until September to have more information about this. It’s cutting it close, but it might be ticked off in time!

8: Get a tattoo

This will probably be next year too.

9: Wear a designer dress on my birthday

This one speaks for itself and obviously won’t be ticked off for another 3 months!

That’s how it stands at the moment. As I was out walking today a black cat crossed my path, so I’m taking it as a sign of good luck that things will work out well!  🙂

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Adventures Part 11: And They Saw The Virgin!

April 24, 2010 at 10:29 am (cholesterol, diets, Dilators, EFL, health, relationships, resolutions, Teaching, TEFL, Things to do before you're 30, Vaginismus) (, , , , , , , , , , , )

I need a massive butt kicking. I’m running the risk of letting my 30th, 31st, 32nd, and every birthday after that, passing without doing anything to sort out my life. I’m just plodding along doing bits here and there thinking I’m doing something, but really I’m not.

My food diary has been going well. I can actually look at it and see that my diet is quite healthy – apart from the odd Friday night breakout of Doritos, nacho cheese dip and peanut butter M&Ms (not together!), but that’s allowed, right?!?!?!? The problem comes with my exercise and dilator plan. Going for a walk twice a week and using the dilators 2-3 times a week really isn’t good enough to make a difference.

I’m still on the 2nd dilator but it hurts like Hell. I’m beginning to think there’s something else wrong cos it’s so uncomfortable. I almost want to take it out as soon as it goes in, but I make myself keep it there and then the burning feeling eases after a minute or so. It’s not getting easier like the 1st one. After 2 weeks with the 1st one it was really easy to use. I think that’s why I’m not so keen to use it everyday like I was before. I have to psyche myself up to get over the pain and do it for 20 minutes. Once I breathe it’s ok-ish, but I can’t see it ever being easy and when I look at the 3rd one I freak out!!!!

So, my new plan is to make out a new schedule which includes exercise and dilator practice – not just work and housework!  🙂

Anyway, I’m going to share a funny story from one of my students this week to cover up the fact that I’ve been very inactive and don’t feel so positive. They had to write an essay for me this week on whatever topic they wanted to. One guy from Spain decided to write about miracles in Catholicism and whether or not he believes in them! He wrote about Lourdes and how the children saw “a virgin”! I corrected this to “the Virgin Mary” and gave it back to him. Of course he asked why I had corrected “a” to “the” and I explained it. He laughed and said that it really would be a miracle if children today saw “a virgin”! I smiled! If only he knew he was sitting in front of one!!!  🙂

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Part 8: The List!

March 2, 2010 at 7:34 pm (Changing jobs, cholesterol, diets, Dilators, EFL, health, Humor, Making the most of your time, relationships, resolutions, Teaching, TEFL, Things to do before you're 30, Travel, Vaginismus) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , )

It has been pointed out to me that almost 6 months into my year I haven’t actually given you a full list of my resolutions. So, here they are and a few comments on how they’re going!

1: Save some money.

I did put some money in the bank and changed my account so I’m getting a better return. I still need to save more, but for now I can tick that one off the list!

 2: See new places

I can tick that one off too! We’ve been to Barcelona, we’re going to Morocco at the end of the month and I’m sure we’ll plan something for later in the year.

 3: Find a new job

This one isn’t even near to being ticked off. For now I have to be happy that I have a job and one that I like (even if I don’t like the place). There is absolutely nothing else out there at the moment for a person who doesn’t really know what she wants to do!

 4: Get fit and healthy

This one is a work in progress. I’ve started keeping my food diary, started cutting out junk food and I’ve stepped up my exercise programme. I should see an improvement soon, right?!?!?!? However, boxes of chocolates and cold weather make it hard! 🙂

 5: Have sex!

Again, this is another work in progress!!!! I’m doing my dilators regularly and I know there’s a little progress, but I want more! I’m still using the first one, but itching to get onto the second one. I try it every now and then. I tried it today and I got it further in than before, but it hurts…….a lot.

I’m the kind of person who needs to see changes quickly or else I give up! Right now between a health kick, job search and dilators, I’m not seeing enough changes and the idea of giving up is right there. So, this needs a lot more work.

 6: Go back to Italy

This one isn’t a major one and could be done next year too! This is a country that I used to fly backwards and forwards to, where I used to live and work, but I haven’t been there for nearly 7 years. My friends there have all got married and most of them have kids now who I’ve never seen. I’d like to go and visit everyone.

 7: Make travel plans

We’ve discussed and thought about this a lot too. We think we might have a kinda plan, but we’re waiting for confirmation. So, this one is half ticked off!!!

 8: Get a tattoo

I’m waiting until the vaginismus is gone before I get this. I’ve wanted a snake tattoo on my foot since I was about 13. I’ve more-or-less settled on a design. Now all I need is the courage!

 9: Wear a designer dress on my birthday

This one speaks for itself and obviously won’t be ticked off for another 6 months!

 There are the resolutions. Don’t ask me why I stopped at 9 instead of 10 cos I’ve no idea. Looking at them now I can see I’m not doing too badly, but some of the big ones are hard.

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Part 6: To Pancake or not to Pancake…….That is the Question?!?!?!?!?

February 16, 2010 at 9:43 pm (cholesterol, diets, Dilators, EFL, health, Humor, pancakes, relationships, resolutions, Things to do before you're 30, Travel, Vaginismus) (, , , , )

There’s nothing like the doctor telling you you’re going to have a heart attack by the time you’re 36 to give you the kick up the ass you needed to make your life healthier. That’s the conversation I had with my doctor on Friday when he called to give me my cholesterol test results!!! My options: seriously clean up my act or go on medication for life. Seeing as I really don’t like the idea of the 2nd option, it looks like I’m going to have to start exercising and give up some of my favourite food. Which leads me onto resolution 7: get fit and healthy before my birthday.

Luckily the time of year is in my favour. We’re coming up to Easter and Lent starts tomorrow – I’m not religious, but it’s a good excuse to cut some things out. Spring is here and the days are getting longer, so it’s easier to get out and about after work. And, Wonder Boy has decided he’s going to do a marathon this year and is out training every second day, so I have a running partner if I want one. Now…I’m NOT going to run a marathon. In fact I hate running. However, I can’t eat dinner until he comes back and has a shower so I might as well get out there while he’s out. Another thing that helps is that our gym which was closed for refurbishment reopened this week and they gave us a month’s free membership for not leaving them while they were closed! So I really have no excuse.

In our aim to get out more we’ve recently had a busy social life. This involved parties with friends, big dinners with family and trips to restaurants. People coming to stay brought more food and drink and led to me being lazy and entertaining. Playing the Wii fit has been the extent of my exercise recently.  🙂  I do hold the ski jump record though – something I’ve been reminding Wonder Boy of this week as we watched the Olympic games!!!! He sighed and rolled his eyes each time I said “I can jump 189m when I do the ski jump on the Wii!!!”

So, now it’s time to start on a new resolution. As for the others……………… the dilator work is going well and I think I might be able to move onto number 2 at the weekend, we have made plans to travel to Morocco next month and we’re working on our longer travel plans. I’m still keeping an eye out for another job, but for the moment I’m happy to be working and planning holidays! Wonder Boy has just arrived in with pancakes and chocolate – yummy, yummy!  🙂   I guess my health kick starts tomorrow!

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